month before. I thought people were happy with me. Through the course of the 3 years with my former employer, he’s the kind of guy that likes to have a lot of women around him. He had a woman living with him, who he had been living with for at least two years, and he wanted me to be his office girlfriend. And I just didn’t want to go there, and I did find myself with some mixed feelings about it. I did have a certain attraction to him cause he was a very powerful guy, not bad looking, charming, good sense of humor. I mean, nobody’s really a monster, you know. Nobody sets out to be mean or a monster, but I’m still angry when I think about it, because I went out of my way to do a good job, help everybody in the office. You know, basically, he asked me to go on a boat ride. This was around early December. I was gonna go, I was gonna go with him, but, you know, thinking it was a boat party or something, but anyway, as it turns out he just kept making these advances on me and at some point it just got unbearable. His girlfriend was always coming into the office, seeing what we were doing. She had her suspicions. I called him out on it, you know. I called him out on it mid December, I just said, I’m tired of this. He has pictures all over his office of Playboy bunnies, okay. I don’t really care about that. I didn’t care that much about him being so into women and liking women’s bodies, having an office that looked like an auto mechanic shop. But it just really hurt me to get fired because I called him out on it. I’ve been trying to make my peace with it, but I had to move back in with my mother. I went through some financial distress from it, and I had filed a case with the state of California, but I didn’t have enough evidence. With only one email that I had, of evidence of what was going on. So, I decided that I probably just needed to put it behind me. 45 Dona (pantalla dreta) Em van despatxar al desembre. Mai abans m’havien despatxat; sempre vaig pensar que era una bona empleada. Bàsicament, acabava de rebre un augment el mes anterior. Creia que la gent estava contenta amb mi. Durant els tres anys amb el meu antic cap... és el tipus d’home a qui li agrada tindre moltes dones al seu voltant. Vivia amb una dona, portava almenys dos anys vivint amb ella, i volia que jo fóra la seua nóvia en l’oficina. I jo no volia fer això, i em doní compte que tenia sentiments trobats sobre això. Sí que em sentia un poc atreta per ell perquè era un tipus molt poderós, no estava malament físicament, encantador, bon sentit de l’humor. O siga, ningú és de veritat un monstre, saps? Ningú es proposa ser roín o un monstre, però encara m’enfade quan ho pense, perquè jo m’esforçava per fer un bon treball, ajudant a tots en l’oficina. I saps què? Doncs que em va demanar que fera un passeig amb vaixell amb ell. Açò va ser al principi del desembre. Jo hi pensava anar, hi pensava anar, però creient que era una festa en un vaixell o alguna cosa pareguda, saps? Però, de totes maneres, resulta que ell seguia insinuant-se’m i en algun moment es va fer insuportable. La seua nóvia sempre venia a l’oficina a veure què féiem. Tenia sospites. Li vaig cridar l’atenció, saps? Li vaig cridar l’atenció a mitjan desembre; li vaig dir; “Estic cansada d’açò.” Ell té fotos per tota la seua oficina de conilletes Playboy, val? Això no m’importa massa. No m’importava molt que a ell li agradaren tant les dones i que li agradaren els cossos de les dones, que tinguera una oficina que pareixia un taller de cotxes. Però em va doldre molt que em despatxara per cridar-li l’atenció. He intentat acceptar-ho, però he hagut de mudar-me a casa de ma mare. He patit un poc econòmicament a causa d’això i he presentat un cas amb l’estat de Califòrnia, però no tenia proves suficients. Amb només un correu electrònic que tenia, com a prova del que passava. Així que vaig decidir que probablement necessitava deixar-ho arrere. Man (left screen) My biggest fear is people. I grew up my whole life just working hard, doing what I have to do. No matter what I did, it was never good enough for
Gillian Wearing
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